The Art of Appearing Human

 ‘They live amongst us, but are not us….’

…the sci-fi tag reads, a picture of a person looking a little blank flashes onto the screen and then the camera pans out, revealing they are standing in the middle of the happy crowd, that person is me. To examine this somewhat egotistical revelation I draw your attention to the emotional spectrum in its simplest form, happiness shines with a merry hue at the positive end as depression is merely outlined by the happiness it is swallowing black hole style at the opposing end.

Machines are emotionally neutral; devoid of feelings as they act on pure logic… some emotionally damaged individuals have the same approach to life as they use levels of emotional detachment to protect themselves. Those cursed to dwell in the negative spectrum are emotional screwed; to put it politely, often prone to faking expressions of happiness to avoid the words a depressive never wants to hear ‘Are you ok?’

You will know someone like this from work, see it in the stranger at the end of the bar, the one whose interactions are limited to ‘Tough day’ ‘thank you very much’ or my fav ‘if I told you, I’d have to kill you’. These individuals have mastered the art of revealing just enough information to create an illusion of character, this image strong enough to fool less trained minds but not those who practice equally effective detachment skills.

Symptoms displayed by people that exercise this masterful false impression are easy to spot if you look;

Do you know what their home looks like?

After conversing with this person to some degree ask yourself, have they divulged any information about where they live that could give you anything more than the county they live in, something that could be useful on Google maps!

Do they give you much detail about close family?

They have parents, their parents are alive, that’s it… but the way they delivered the thinner than paper detailing of their family life has kept you thinking you might be learning something useful.

Have you ever heard a frank and non-vague account of life events?

What do you do? I’m an accountant, Where have you travelled? Here and there, Where did you get that scar? An accident, for all intense purposes they have just slammed a door in your face but again the delivery of this vague information gives an impression of richness and depth.

Do they occasionally reveal a weakness, but don’t seem that affected by it?

They have revealed a weakness, that illusive chink in the armour of stone… but wait… you’re not really getting the impression it’s really the kryptonite you were led to believe it is, but you’re blinded to doubt by the fact that the past two hours of door slamming have paid off.

The art of appearing human is a fine one indeed, too much and people might think you want a conversation and so you’re locked in mind numbing small talk, too little and some annoyingly fluffy type feels offended and the words ‘do you really care?’ are used, your preferred response ‘I don’t give a flying fuck’ doesn’t help much by the way!

For the readers that consider this to be unsocial I beg you to think, that stony faced bastard might not be spilling the beans to you but they will have friends and family to which being open and honest causes no issues, what are the reasons for the layers of pentagon style defence programming and why do you want to know what lies beneath.

The nature of a man who hides his true self is not always pure or happy, some people are not blessed with the fluffy style personality that exudes sociability to a point of perfection and if they have lost the ability to trust is it really a good idea to force them to trust you.

To conclude I give you these words ‘Behind these cold dead eyes lie worlds beyond’ but as to whether you want to know what worlds lie beyond, or if you can live with the idea they might not be to your liking, that is where an even finer art begins… the art of interrogation!


2 thoughts on “The Art of Appearing Human

    • I might just be more anti-social as her I think!
      Then again, outside of my crowd pleasing placid replies I could so easily offence with effortless ease, the words ‘Fucking idiots’ or if I really am unimpressed… ‘Women’, then you know I’m pissed off!
      Of course one has to gauge the tone of a comment, such innocent words drifting on the right tone can edge a demonic value to any exchange, ‘How nice’ so sweet but with the right delivery, that’s fun!
      As I digress I fail to acknowledge the queen of poisonous barbs, yourself fair lady, and even more fun is knowing you will take that as a compliment!!

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