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The very ground beneath your feet is rapidly disintegrating in a hideous combination of noises as fertile ground shrivels atrociously into toxic ash and animals screech in pain

The air in your immediate encompass has shrouded horribly into an acidic haze to choke the very life out of anyone unlucky enough to be close enough

And should a fated soul engage in verbal exchange with your person the poison dripping barbs of purest spite will flow so freely in their direction that even dental records won’t be enough to identify the body

The foulest of sins to make unwanted physical contact results in the painfully excruciating deterioration of flesh with the most satisfying release of wrenching screams

The evidential indications suppose only one outcome; you’re in a venomous mood

What has summoned forth the most hellion forms of moody dispersion on anything the world could offer, so perversely twisted is your current state of mind that even god offering a dream home and the winning lottery ticket would result in verbal tornados of lacerating abuse. The reason is… you are officially an arsehole!

It is bred into the very founding fibres of our educational journey that good manners and better refinements of character will emboss every moment of our lives with positivity, and should you envelope even one solitary naughty word with ill intent you shall commit in earnest damnation a hells reception. But to this I say ‘BULLSHIT’ in every ill intent and with a rousingly loud chorus of hell to salute the blue shaded air, for the truth as ever is only revealed when all wrong is cast in vicious tirades against our better nature.

To be engaged with such rudely and unwanted interruptions during our finely crafted routines or the worst of news, even politely spoken and nicely versed, is delivered will generate an acidic reaction to dissolve readily any lovely response. Who has been told ‘It’s bad news’ and not wanted to throttle the wretch from whom the originating trouble has sprung, or faced the final fatality of the nail clippings in the sink after a very much cautionary loaded warning that visitors will be descending upon the abode.

Do not worry, all is good…..

Healthy expression of resenting factors is an exercise we humanity will no doubt talk down with mildly mannered theories and terms to placate idiots, cause guilty ruminations of grandiose scale but in the end it’s just a natural response. And after ‘that day’ or ‘that meeting’ or even ‘that month/year’ depending your ability to process negative events, fuck you to anyone who with wistful disregarding actions ignores the very warning signs I have outlined at the beginning of this piece.

To the long suffering ones who have to hear us graphically outline the very minute details of our ‘experience’ so gravely cascading us into that bleakly overcast mood, who present a beverage of choice and warmly responsive feedback; give them medals so shiny the sun itself is put to shame and never withdraw from returning the favour.

“We are all arseholes some of the time, just as long as we aren’t complete arseholes all of the time

And to who challenges a positively challenged person with idiocy, let there be justifiable verbal storms!”


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